A fresh start in a familiar place
Well hello there!
I haven't written here on this blog in quite some time now. I used to post about motherhood and share some of my personal, everyday photography here, but as you can read in my last post, I made the decision that those things belong on my professional blog- that there wasn't so much of separation between my daily life and my business, so it should just all be in one place. So ever since May of last year I've been writing and posting over there, and also sharing lots of daily life tidbits on Instagram.
Over the last several weeks, I've begun a journey towards healing from years of almost daily migraines. I've shared a bit about the changes I'm making in my Instagram feed, but I was thinking maybe I should start a new blog to chronicle all of this. While I am definitely not an expert by any stretch, I've been passionate about health and nutrition topics for yeas, and have read a ton on the subject. I love creating new recipes and trying new things, and of course taking pictures of all of it, so why not share some of that? As I pondered a name for this hypothetical health/food/life-to-the-fullest blog, and began thinking of what the design would be like (because of course that is of utmost importance to design nerds like myself), it dawned on me to just start up again here.
Seeking Equipoise- seeking balance- is exactly what I am doing. When I named this blog, I was thinking balance in terms of life in general. Now I'm focusing on balance in my body through whole foods and healthy living. And it's my hope and prayer that as I find that balance and bring my hormones and chemistry into harmony within my body, that the pain that plagues my days will be just a memory.
So welcome to Seeking Equipose, version 2.0!
A few months ago, my headaches had once again increased in frequency, so that I was in pain for at least part of nearly every day. Sometimes I'd go to bed with a migraine and wake up after a rest;ess night to find it still pounding away. I was tired, impatient, mentally foggy, and some days even depressed because of the constant pain.
My chronic headaches began when I was a teenager, and back then I had every test done, saw many different doctors and tried many different medications with various yucky side effects. Nothing was found to be specifically wrong with me, no apparent cause could be found, and nothing that was tried ever helped.
I turned 17 during my first year away at college (yes I was a just a baby), and a new doctor tried me on a strong, nasty medicine that made me feel drugged all the time but still didn't help. After months of feeling that way, losing 12 pounds, and still having headaches, I decided that traditional western doctors and methods were not going to help me. I began seeing a chiropractor regularly, and ended up learning so much about health from her. Getting adjusted did decrease the frequency of my headaches, which I've been so grateful for, but it did not make them stop.
Over the eight years since then, I've lived with migraines. They're an unwelcome part of my life. Sometimes they only come once or twice a week, but other times its every day. Late last year the frequency increased again, and I was busy being mom to my two boys and running a full time photography business. I pushed through the pain as best I could, as I couldn't afford to succumb to it. But one day I just knew something had to give. There must be an answer; I simply can't accept that all this pain has no cause. Both my chiropractor and my nutrition expert friend Liz advised that I keep a food journal and look for possible triggers. Then through Liz's advice, I began an elimination diet. For at least the next three months I'm cutting dairy, gluten, and sugar out of my diet, to see if there is any difference once they're fully out of my system. I'm also minimizing processed food, eating raw and juicing frequently, and following a routine of supplements that Liz recommended.
These are huge changes, made rather suddenly- especially after the crazy processed sugar fest of the holiday season! But it will we worth it, and I reached a point of desperation. One night after eating a piece of cake and just feeling terrible immediately, I realized how ridiculous it was for me to consume things that ruin my health and overall happiness, just because they taste good while I'm eating them. It's simply not worth it. I decided then and there that I'll give up whatever I need to in order to be free from this pain, because once I am I know that I'll be a better mom, wife, and friend, a more focused business owner and artist, and just a much happier person.
So here I am, writing this to document my journey to a better, healthier life. I'm only weeks into this, and making new little changes all the time still. I'm still getting headaches of varying intensity daily, but I can already tell that my body feels healthier. On those rare headache-free days, I have so much more life and energy than I used to, and I'm tons more productive. Last week, as I was dancing with Seth in the living room, my husband commented that I'm a different person when I'm not hurting. It's so true. I hope that those days are a preview of what every day will be like in the future! I have no idea who out there will be interested in all of this, but I'm writing it for myself and for anyone who might be helped or inspired by it. If you decide to follow along or even join in a bit- welcome! I'm so glad you're here!